Allyson Spellman

Photo: Saray Taylor-Roman

I Will Be a Light

By Allyson Spellman

Allyson Spellman makes a career of emboldening women to use their strengths for good. The Advocacy Issue was a natural collaboration for this busy mom, actress, Telly Award winner, motivational speaker, philanthropist, JTV host, vegan, animal rights activist, and entrepreneur.

I cannot take credit for the quote that has been the underlying theme of my life. They are words that I heard Brené Brown speak in her Netflix documentary “The Call To Courage.” These words struck a chord in me because they are the catalyst to where I am today.

“Start every day by putting your feet on the floor and saying, Today I will choose courage over comfort. I can’t make any promises for tomorrow, but today I will choose to be brave.”

To follow your dreams, passion, and purpose takes courage. To step out of the safety zone where it is comfortable requires resilience and determination. To be fearless and take a leap of faith, trusting that the net will appear, is one of the bravest things we can do.

My work in the entertainment industry and my devotion to animal activism have given me a crash course in courage.

I always had the divine instinct that I was to be in front of the camera starting from a young age. I remember dressing up and singing with my hairbrush in my room like so many little girls dreaming of stardom through innocent eyes. I was very fortunate to have great opportunities at a young age to live out that dream, but what took the most courage was heading to New York City with two suitcases in my hand, knowing no one and staying with a “friend of a friend of a friend” as I started out my journey in the big city.

However, it didn’t take long for that journey to take many unexpected emotional detours. Audition after audition, I would experience the same cliché scenario. There were a hundred other hopeful actresses who looked exactly like me filling the room, all fighting for the same part. And time and time again, I was told that I was lacking something as I left that very same room. I wasn’t tall enough, I wasn’t blonde enough, I wasn’t thin enough, I wasn’t the right age, the list was never-ending. Obviously, you don’t have to be in the entertainment world to experience this kind of criticism.

During that time of my life came a great game-changing lesson that I still hold onto today. To be able to own and celebrate what makes us different takes courage—especially in a world that constantly tells us how to look, how to act, and how to live. The art of no longer seeing “flaws” but instead seeing “fabulous” is what sets us apart in a great way. They are the things that make us memorable and stand out from the crowd.

I believe comparison really is the thief of joy. Why compare yourself to others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you. No one has your DNA. No one has your fingerprints. How can you possibly compare something so one-of-a-kind with anyone else? No one can do what you do. No one can bring your unique thoughts, talents, and experience to the table like you. You are a once-in-all-of-history event. Celebrate it!

I started to embrace what others criticized in a big, bold way and no longer believed these “flaws” were holding me back but instead saw them “fabulously” thrusting me forward. This shift in my thinking helped me secure roles on several projects, and if I got a “no” I simply saw it as “Next Opportunity.” This process wasn’t overnight. It took time, tenacity, grace with myself, consistency, self-love, and most of all it took courage.

Trust me, it takes courage to step out and start living unapologetically and authentically. But once you do and you experience the freedom that comes with releasing the weight of worrying about what others think or measuring up to unrealistic standards, it is hard to ever go back and sacrifice something so sacred.

You also have to step out of your comfort zone to take a stand for the causes you are passionate about, that truly stir your soul. For as long as I can remember I have always had a connection with animals. I was that little girl always bringing stray animals home, helping the turtle cross the road quickly so it wouldn’t get hit or finding an injured bird and immediately taking it to the vet.

My desire to help animals was more than just a sentimental feeling, it was a calling. Even as life got busy and my career flourished, I never stopped doing what I could to help an animal in need that was directly in my path. I didn’t believe or recognize at that time that I could make an impact as an animal advocate on a larger scale.

No matter how busy I became or how distracted I was, the divine nudge within me served as a constant reminder to not forget my calling. The fire within me never went away—I just kept it at a comfortable flicker.

In 2001, I was flipping through a magazine at my hair salon and I saw a recognizable and beautiful actress surrounded by rescue dogs. Her name is Shannon Elizabeth and she was especially huge at the time, starring in “American Pie” and “Scary Movie.”

I went on to read how passionate she was about animal welfare and her story inspired me. To this day, I can remember how the salon looked, opening the magazine, what I was wearing, and how I felt as I was glued to every word. I felt in my gut there was something special about this article.

As I read it, I learned she started a dog and cat rescue in Los Angeles called Animal Avengers. She also talked about using her celebrity profile for good and how she used her platform to make a difference. At the time, I wasn’t sure why that article hit me the way it did, but now I do.

Over the years, I kept recalling that article that sparked something within me. I would be driving and it would pop into my mind. I would be on set and “randomly” it would yet again infiltrate my thoughts. I was so impressed Shannon used her platform for good. I wanted to “one day” do that as well, but I needed to wait for the right time to boldly take a stand for animal welfare.

But as I waited for the “right time” I realized there were those out there who did not have the luxury of time. The only time these animals had was right now to be saved and not a minute more.

Then like a light switch, it clicked for me; my purpose lit up and it hasn’t been dimmed ever since. Something was ignited in me and I knew there was no more sitting on the sidelines watching others do the work.

I shifted from the mindset of someone should do something about that, to realizing I am that somebody. I finally understood we all have a platform wherever we are today. It is our families, friends, neighbors, community, networks, co-workers, and social media. We can positively impact and influence anyone, anywhere, and at any time in our life. Never underestimate the power that passion can persuade.

It’s pretty amazing when you decide to make a wholehearted commitment and act with courage, the universe aligns the people and places to support you. I have seen this countless times.

About 10 years after I read that article, I became friends with Shannon’s cousin who connected us in NYC. I now serve on the U.S. board of the Shannon Elizabeth Foundation where we are working diligently with anti-poaching units and organizations to help save endangered animals in South Africa. She is not only one of my closest friends, she was also my mentor in animal advocacy and continues to be such a positive role model in my life.

Being devoted to activism of any kind takes courage.

“It is excruciatingly painful to see either first-hand or images of cruelty toward another being.”

Those images stay with us and emotionally haunt us. I was petrified to go there. I had to come to terms with the fact that no matter how uncomfortable, gut-wrenching, and painful it was for me to see these things, my turning away does not help the situation. It continues if I look away. Turning a blind eye because of my pain does not help those that feel the real pain.

I still struggle with the pain of witnessing cruelty. I have shed many, many tears. But I also have celebrated many, many victories.

When I became a mother my activism turned into something much larger. I began to wonder what world will my daughter know? What animals will she only know in pictures because they no longer roam the earth? Will she know oceans without pollution? How will she be taught an environmental ethic?

Rather than force my rules of living on my daughter, I decided to be an open book. I strive to lead by example. Sometimes I do it well, sometimes I fall hard flat on my face. I am a work in progress and I always will be.

Seeing connection, concern, and compassion through her eyes has given me a new perspective. Oftentimes, children say they want to be just like their parents when they grow up. Personally, I want to be just like my daughter. I also want to give her a kinder world. And, if I can’t do that, I at least want to give her the tools to challenge injustices against all beings. Sometimes our actions may seem insignificant, but a small ripple can gain momentum and build a current that is so powerful it will make a difference way beyond our lifetime. That is the legacy I want to leave.

I started this story with a quote from Brené Brown, I will also close out with one: “Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”

No matter what obstacles or difficulties we encountered in the dark times of our life, we must constantly remember to shine our light boldly and unapologetically. Learn to embrace the darkness as it helps us reach our highest potential and purpose. It certainly may not be comfortable but it is so worth it!